The Gift of Family of Choice

Holidays are a time to celebrate with family, but for some, it can be miserable. In this divisive time of Covid, politics, and religion, spending time with relatives can be too difficult. As a result of this division, comes a new way of celebrating the holidays, with the idea of, “family of choice.”

A family of choice can be anyone that you desire, as long as you feel comfortable and understood with those people. It can range from friends, coworkers, and neighbors. People who love you for your authentic self, and don’t expect you to change when you are around them. The importance of a found family is the fact that it can be between anyone, whether bound by blood or not.

Many people choose to celebrate the holidays with their families of choice, for a variety of reasons. Some merely find it easier to celebrate with those already living close to them, and find the trip back home tedious and far too time-consuming.

Others find their families of choice more understanding than the family they are actually related to. There’s less argument due to generational differences, and more understanding and compassion. The family of choice already accepts you for who you are, while some biological families may not, especially with older relatives.

Family of choice has been of great importance to the LGBTQ+ community. Many times, our queer siblings have been shut out or mistreated by family members. So, this idea has helped bring people together, who may have been shunned by family members,”

said Mr. Blair, a Creative Writing teacher here at CSArts.

With the rise of mental-health awareness, families of choice only become more important. People would rather spend time with those who don’t affect their mental health negatively, regardless of relation. It’s hard to connect with those who won’t connect with you, which many feel when being around their extended family. An intense family gathering is not the recipe for feeling good about the holidays, and can put a damper on what is meant to be a joyful time.

However, with the gift of choice, holiday celebrations don’t have to feel this way. There’s no need for time with those you love to be weighed down by obligation and formality. Instead, people have the opportunity for new ways of celebrating, beginning new traditions on their own terms. Through a family of choice, people are allowed to make the holidays truly their own.

The core of the holidays has always been to spend time with those you love, celebrating the love and care you give for each other. No matter who you spend the holidays with, it should always be with someone that will make you smile.